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Yet she started spending a lot of time with the man. “[It] really saddens me as an educator, because I feel that I cannot do anything,” she said.
In a recent class at COSAT, students discussed the dangers. She thinks she should probably avoid relationships for a while.
“You don’t expect to be the only one in [a relationship with] that sugar daddy,” said Sihle, a junior. “It’s back to that normal life, that old life, and I don’t want to go back there,” she said. But she said, honestly, if she is approached by an older man again, she is not sure what she’ll do.
“There can be, like, five of you [with] that same guy.” But while some girls focused on the risks of dating older men, others spoke about the benefits “Sometimes it’s nice to have a sugar daddy, because you live a fancy life, you wear posh clothes, and people will notice you,” said Zethu, a junior.
Sima (not her real name) lives in a small, dilapidated house in a sprawling township on the outskirts of Cape Town, South Africa. “I wish I could just go away — not be with them while they are fighting,” she said. The reason for the gap, South Africa’s minister of health said last year, is "sugar daddies" — older men who have sex with much younger women.
Most nights, she and her siblings go to bed hungry. “We just drink water and go to sleep.” Her mother works part-time as a cleaner. A few months ago, while visiting her older sister who lives a few blocks away, Sima was washing clothes near the road. Like many schools in Africa, the Centre of Science and Technology (COSAT) — a public high school near Cape Town — cautions girls about these relationships.
In fact, studies have shown that the rate of HIV among school-aged girls in South Africa is nearly three times higher than among school-aged boys.
These relationships, common in many areas, have enabled HIV to move quickly from one generation to the next.
When the class ended, I spoke with the teacher, Zoe Bikwana.
She said she often has a hard time convincing girls to end relationships with older men.Tags: Adult Dating, affair dating, sex dating